Tickle me emo

Within the past week, I found out that I had inadvertently hurt the feelings of a couple of very dear friends. I’m happy to report those fences have been mended; otherwise, I’d still be in the pasture swinging a hammer rather than putzing around Blogger. But while I was still in damage control mode, I searched for a cute little animated smiley that would allow me to apologize with irresistible charm and cuteness. So I did some trolling through Photobucket using the keyword, “Sorry.”

The search results confirmed what I had long suspected: the Internet has been overrun by intelligent-yet-pretentious, angst-ridden emoteens.

For those who want a full refresher course in this pop culture phenomenon, check Wikipedia’s entry on Emo. Here’s the Reader’s Digest version: think Goth without the cool fashion sense or the good music.

My “Sorry” search started out innocently enough: there was this little message that was merely a little pouty.


Then the angst began to truly flow.


I found several different variations on this little ditty, which stopped me dead (pardon my pun) in my tracks.


The combination of this item’s morbidity and its ubiquity kind of lends it a unintended humor. I mean, the Photobucket search results suggest it’s downright trndy to express your regret through stylishly suicidal art. Yikes!

Well, once I started chuckling at the artistic angst of others, I couldn’t stop.


And I’m sorry I keep forgetting to turn off the hall light. But know that it’s ripping my soul out!



The lyrics are just about incomprehensible, but it’s the photo that’s genius here. The poor gent seems to be saying “How did I let my girlfriend convince me to buy this couch instead of the futon I wanted. My friends are going to think I am totally whipped!”

And then, there was the image that needed no additional commentary.


Indeed.

Conclusions? It’s no longer hard to say you’re sorry – especially if you’re willing to tear out your spleen for the one you love.

Banksy shots

This is going to be one of those copout posts. You've been warned. Sorry, but for someone not doing much, I've had a lot going on.

Nevertheless, this is a value-added entry. I'd like to show you some of the most provocative modern art I've ever seen. It gives me a bit of an idea why Andy Warhol was apparently so important.

The artist's name is Banksy, and those of you who follow pop culture may know him as the artist-prankster who secretly replaced hundreds of Paris Hilton CD's with his own bootlegs, complete with scandalously titilating Photoshopped variations on the original jacket art.

But there's a serious mind buried within this jester. And some incredible talent as well. Here's one of my favorite pieces from his latest exhibition:


For more, follow the link in this post's title.

Remembering

On the morning of Sept. 11, 2001, the first thing I noticed was that WMAY, our principal AM news station, was hosting a live remote from the Mel-O-Cream doughnut shop at the Sixth Street end of our alley. (It’s now a Jimmy John’s.) I grabbed a free doughnut and headed to work. It was about 7:50 a.m. When I got to work, several things happened simultaneously: I heard some sort of accident had happened at the World Trade Center, I got a call from my wife saying a plane had hit one of the Twin Towers, and I noticed I couldn’t reach any of the news Web sites I had bookmarked on my computer.

We didn’t have a TV in the building, but my wife had one in her office, so she fed me regular updates. The second plane hit the WTC at about the same time we were able to set up a radio to hear the news from New York. My wife, who had had a bad feeling with the first plane strike, now was convinced we were under attack.

Of course, it was hard for me to form any opinions, as I couldn’t see what was going on. The Web was still log-jammed from billions of hits from people like me, who were wondering what the hell was going on. Then, I got the call from my wife saying the Pentagon had been hit. That’s when I really started to panic.

But there was no time for panic, as one of my work colleagues who had planned to get married in the county courthouse two blocks away had decided that she was going through with the wedding. I joined the procession of work friends who made the quiet walk to the courthouse. I remember looking out the window of the fifth floor wondering if a county courthouse in a capital city was a viable target. As it turned out, the wedding went off without a hitch. In retrospect, it was a bold statement that life could go on in the midst of such barbarism.

But life would never be the same. And I guess that’s what I carry with me five years later: an anger that 19 fanatics could rob a country of its innocence and joy – a robbery from which I would argue we still haven’t recovered. Nor may we ever. That there has to be a post-9/11 world still fills me with bitterness if I think about it too long. But today is a day for remembering. And despite the bitterness remembrance brings, I owe it to those who died that day to remember.

As do we all.

Whither Pluto?

It’s not every day your solar system gets remapped. And yet, today, a group of Really Important Men in Really Impressive White Coats have decided that Pluto shall no longer be named a planet. Instead, it will be henceforth named a “dwarf.”

Why don’t they just call it “Billy Barty”?

Trying to make Pluto supporters feel better, Irish astronomer Jocelyn Bell Burnell said, ”It could be argued that we are creating an umbrella called ‘planet’ under which the dwarf planets exist.”

Sure, Jocelyn … why don’t you just tell Pluto you still wanna be friends?

Did I mention ole Joss was waving a stuffed Pluto doll under an umbrella when she tried to make us all feel better? Oh, that makes all the planetary pain go away. Bitch.

***

In happier news, my blood sugar seems to be stabilizing in the high 90s, which takes me out of the diabetes danger zone. (Cue the Kenny Loggins music.) And my dietician has taken me off the Atkinsy-type diet I was on and put me on a more tradition, 1800-calorie, 300 carb-a-day diet. And, at the cost of stabbing my finger most every day for a week, I have learned how much I can “get away with” and maintain a healthy blood sugar level.

All in all, life is settling way down, which means you may see more of these witty slices of life, dear readers. “About time,” you say? I agree.

How I learned to stop missing muffins

In the past three weeks:

• I have served a half-day of jury duty.
• I have lost my Uncle Fred.
• I have completed work on one of the most emotionally taxing work projects ever.
• I have started seven more.
• I have had one cheat night out of two-and-a-hald weeks on a low-carb diet.
• I have lost somewhere in the neighborhood of 20 pounds. (Weighing someone in a wheelchair is an imprecise science, unless you happen to have easy access to a loading dock cargo scale.)
• I have endured 12 hours of thinking I had lost one of my best friends (though not in the way I lost my Uncle Fred, thank God).
• I have started exercising.
• I have purchased three really cheap video games.

And those are just the highlights. Until I have time to dwell on one or more of these subjects, I give you a silly and, at times, disturbing video that has curbed my craving for blueberry muffins.

Alas, biscuits! Alas, gravy!

The Good Doctor is in for a lifestyle change.

No, not that kind of lifestyle change, silly ... although there is a rather interesting blog post there which will wait for a day down the line.

I have been diagnosed as pre-diabetic.

Here are some numbers for those of you with a frame of reference: my A1C was 6.2 (depending on your scale, "normal" is below either 6 or 7) and my fasting blood sugar was 105 ("normal" is between 60 and 110). Because those numbers are borderlinish, and because my mom and dad both had adult-onset diabetes, he went ahead and diagnosed me.He wants me to see a diabetes dietician (which I will be doing) and start taking metformin (which I am not going to do -- not yet, anyway.) Regardless, my diet is going to have to change, and in researching the dietician's likely suggestions, I was thrown for a nasty loop.

Donuts? Gone. (Actually, all sweets are, for that matter, but the loss of donuts is the only devastating one for me.) Gravy? Gone. White rice? Gone. Pasta? Gone.

And here's a biggie. Alcohol? Gone.

Now, I'm not what I would consider close to being an alcoholic. But every week or two, I want to get shit-faced. So this part of the diabetic diet really, really, REALLY sucks. I sit here wondering how I will fill my own party prescriptions now? And what of biscuits and gravy?

Shaker songs

Well, folks, I apologize for my blogoreticence as of late, but as Steve Miller sang, “There’s lots of funky shit going down in the city.” Work has been extremely pressurized (though still rewarding) as of late. Meanwhile, our home life, while as sweet as ever, has been in flux due to a number of factors, including Mrs. Z’s need to bow out of her summer show due to work conflicts.

The practical upshot of all this has been a dearth of blog posts. And it’s you, the reader, who has suffered. I apologize and hope this entry will help make up for it.

I want to talk about music. More to the point, I want to talk about music that isn’t necessarily your favorite or the staple of your iPod track list. I don’t want to spend time discussing music that’s danceable or hummable. I want to talk about five songs that, for one reason or another, have a profound emotional effect on me. And on you. But I’ll go first.














Vangelis
“First Approach”

Most listeners know Vangelis for one song and one song only: the theme to “Chariots of Fire.” While this song is memorable, it represents but a fraction of the Greek composer’s music. A lot of it has either a “spacey” theme or sound – or both. Such is the case with the CD “Direct,” released in 1990. But while “spacey” might suggest tacky, synthesized, mechanical music, the next-to-the-last track on “Direct” is anything but. Marked by a beautiful melody and a heartfelt cello solo, “First Approach” evokes a breathtaking mental image of an astronaut preparing to dock at a station after years in the isolation of space. And if you close your eyes, you can feel the ache of loneliness melting away into the relief of finally being at rest.


Bobby McFerrin
“Common Threads”

I’m not sure what it was about 1990, but it also produced this gorgeous song by Bobby McFerrin. Part of the gut-punching quality of this song comes from knowing the story behind its composition: McFerrin was commissioned to write it to accompany a documentary on the AIDS quilt. But one need not know the back-story to feel the weight of this wordless lullaby. Its gorgeous harmonies convey a sense of premature sorrow mingled with hope against all odds — a mixture that somehow reminds me of “Seasons of Love,” which would be recorded six years later.


John Rutter
“Gloria: Second Movement (Andante)”

Anyone who has ever sung any amount of choral music has made friends with Mr. Rutter. All of his music is beautiful, and particularly his three-movement standard for high school all-state choirs: “Gloria.” But while the first and third movements have joy and energy to spare, it is the second movement that really packs an emotional wallop. Led by a quietly exotic organ solo and layered male vocals, the music builds until a full brass ensemble and the entire choir burst forth in majestic sound. Then, suddenly, the sound becomes to a single note, which falls away into once-again quiet, but rich, harmonies. If heaven has a soundtrack, it is this song.


The Manhattan Transfer
“Foreign Affair”

Closing out the jazz quartet’s breakthrough album “Extensions,” which included much better known songs like “Birdland” and “Twilight Tone,” is this a capella number. It defines cool because it combines incredibly sophisticated lyrics (so awesomely verbose I had to copy them down into a spiral notebook as a kid — there was not lyric sheet with the cassette) with absolutely gorgeous jazz harmony. But it’s the out-of-nowhere last chord that puts it on this list for me. I get goose bumps every time I hear it.


Barry Manilow
“Once Voice”

I probably shouldn’t admit it, but there’s still one Barry Manilow song that absolutely does it for me. It’s just as schmaltzy as the rest of the Manilow canon, but “One Voice” is perhaps the purest match between music and lyrics ever. Plus, it has some whiz-bang a capella studio overdubbing to the nth degree, which I'm a sucker for anyway. But the clincher is the soaring, everybody-join-hands final chorus. I dare you to not be smiling at the end of it.

So, what five songs shake you to your emotional core? Respond on your own blog, or your MySpace bulletin, or in these comments.

R.I.P., Nathan Cooke

A local performer and artist, Nathan was only 2/3 my age when he passed away last night, but did three times the living. His star burned briefly, but brilliantly. He will be greatly missed.

Now playing: The official song of summer 2006?

Not only is it a cool song, but the band is dressed up as Star Wars characters. What better way is there to make sure The Force is with you?

Now normally, I'd just attempt to get away with letting the multimedia presentation carrying this post. But not this time, dear readers. You deserve more.

So, on to a recap of the last two weeks or so.

"Annie Warbucks" opened to crowds of 1,072 on Friday and 729 on Sunday. We were rained out Saturday.

Our parade was also rained upon by a surprisingly harsh review. I'd link you to it, but a subscription is required, and Zoomie don't play that. Suffice it to say that the review started with four paragraphs of criticism of the material as a pale copy of the original "Annie." Unfortunately, the going only got rougher as the director and many of the principals got roughed up. Yours truly actually got a positive individual review, but it seems rather a Pyrrhic victory.

I have never been one to take reviews to heart for long, and I definitely don't hold with the conventional wisdom that community theater should be given a wide berth simply because it is community theater. Either you want your show reviewed or you don't. There really is no such thing as bad publicity.

However, the Springfield masses aren't with me on this one, and as a result, a flood of letters to the editor in our support crashed through the State Journal-Register editorial pages (along with one brave soul who actually agreed with the review, a rarity to be sure). And yet, the most interesting part of this story is a bit of controversy as to whether the reviewer actually stayed for the whole thing. There are, apparently, witnesses who either saw here leaving or standing at the back gate to the site during Act II. The paper has issued a denial, and I will leave the matter there. That said, it has been interesting to see a dash of scandal mixed in with the more traditional outrage sauce.

Meanwhile, Mrs. Z has started rehearsals for "Aida," which, by all accounts, should rock. I'm looking forward to taking it in, as I've never seen the show.

Also, we're in the process of cobbling together an audition for the Springfield Theatre Centre's production of "Assassins." Auditions are a week and a half away. I wouldn't say we're panicked, but ... NYEAAGHHH!!!!

Finally, assuming we survive that experience, we're looking forward toward a truly utopian vacation cum anniversary celebration the weekend after. Quality time with the Mrs. ... adventure ... relaxation ... they're all in the cards, and I'm all in!

So there you have it, dear readers. Overall, life is good, and I have to admit it's getting better all the time.

Not to harp on the hair, but ...

It has apparently taken over my personality ...

You Are Dr. Bunsen Honeydew

You take the title "mad scientist" to the extreme -with very scary things coming out of your lab.And you've invented some pretty cool things, from a banana sharpener to a robot politician.But while you're busy turning gold into cottage cheese, you need to watch out for poor little Beaker! "Oh, that's very naughty, Beaker! Now you eat these paper clips this minute."

The Muppet Personality Test

The things I do for my art

In order to play this guy …



I’ve had to shave my goatee and drastically cut my hair, which has left me looking like this guy …



Unfortunately, once I put my show toupee on, I look like this guy …



which actually makes me miss looking like this guy …

Have a slice of me

Everything Pizza

Diverse and adaptable, you enjoy the full buffet of life. It's hard to you play favorites with friends ... or flavors. There's very little that you dislike!

What's Your Pizza Personality?

Get up. Go to work. Go to rehearsal. Go to bed. Rinse. Repeat.

That's going to be my life for about the next two-and-a-half weeks, so bear with me if I'm not quite as jocular as usual. I'm jolly on the inside!

Welcome to my nightmare(s)

(Note to readers: This is the first official DrAstroZoom Myspace blog simulcast.)

Last weekend, I had two remarkably similar dreams in one night. They still have me somewhat baffled.

In the first dream, I was to play a leading role in a musical version of “Hamlet.” (It may have even been Hamlet himself, but I’m not sure.) The production had a rock-opera feel to it along the lines of what Andrew Lloyd Webber might have generated had he set his sights on the Prince of Denmark rather than the Prince of Peace. And it was in a far more ornate theater than I’ve ever performed in.

On the first day of tech week, however, I was attacked by birds that pecked at my legs. I was left with unsightly sores that threatened infection. Regardless, I attempted to soldier on, but my performance that night was horrible.

Later that night, a similar dream came. This time, I was the Emcee in Cabaret, and again, the venue had a professional (if antiquated) feel about it. As I left the dressing area to go on, I realized the ramps to the stage had been removed. I somehow made it on stage, only to discover the stage was drenched, causing me to slip and slide, even at one point flying from a raised portion of the stage to a lower level down center. Again, my performance was wild, sloppy and generally pathetic.

And that’s all I remember.

I immediately dismissed the idea that these dreams were related to my current show. Actually, “Annie Warbucks” is going quite well and is a far cry from what devoted readers will lovingly remember as “Theater Armageddon.” My next audition is for “Assassins,” but that audition date had not been announced when I had these dreams, and I hadn’t even begun pre-obsession over it.

All I know is this pair of dreams were as vivid as any I’ve had for months. I also found it curious that not only was I clearly in a wheelchair in both dreams, but it played a part in the “plot” of both. This, too, is relatively rare for me.

In other news, Mrs. Z is headed to southern Illinois tomorrow for her sister’s 25th wedding anniversary. She has mercifully allowed me to stay home, seeing as I’m moving into the most grueling part of my AW rehearsal schedule. Still, even one night away from her is cause for sadness. I’ll have my mom to take me to dinner and a movie, but that doesn’t hold a candle to Mrs. Z. (Sorry, Mom.)

All that said, I’m not remotely in the state of melancholy this post would seem to indicate. Quite the obvious: life is good right now, and as Howard Jones sang, “Things can only get better.”

Who oh ohhh oh who ohhh oh, indeed.

That sinking feeling

Take the "Which Poseidon character are you?" test at Hell in a Handbag Productions

So, I'm an Ernest Borgnine character. Exciting!

So, too, is the movie translation of "Aeon Flux." If you're a sci-fi fan, don't believe the inexplicably preponderant negative critical reviews of this movie. Instead, enjoy a fairly thoughtful plot, exquisitely crafted visuals and action sequences and ... oh yes ... Charlize Theron. Grr, baby. Very grr.

I'll try to build on my tentatively progressing blogging momentum this week, dear readers. Keep the faith.

How to see in the dark

I apologize for my radio silence, dear readers. Life has been imposing itself, and I take consecutive moments I have to breath without an agenda as blessed.

To make up for my absence, I point you to a page that does, in fact, explain how you can see in the dark. Just click the link above!

A musical interlude

If you don't recognize this tune, marvel at the guitar ambidexterity. If you do, enjoy the warm fuzzy.

Hate the sin. Love the spinners.

Let me start by saying I was appalled and offended by the ending of this week’s conclusion of the two-part “South Park” episode “Cartoon Wars.” The depiction of Jesus, President Bush and the American flag was, by turns, rude and sacrilegious. That said … I totally see where the show’s evil geniuses, Matt Stone and Trey Parker, were coming from and can’t help but applaud their ingenuity in making a valid point.

To catch up, click the link in this post’s headline.

What started as a skewering of Scientology has blossomed into an animated debate on censorship and hypocrisy. When Comedy Central refused to show Mohammed as part of thew climax of “Cartoon Wars,” Stone and Parker decided to end the show by cramming in all the offensive material the network would allow, couched within a fictional retaliatory film by Al Qaeda.

The decision on the Mohammed image was apparently “made over concerns for public safety.” Or as the network itself said in a statement: "In light of recent world events, we feel we made the right decision."

Seeing Comedy Central would allow blasphemous images of Christ where it wouldn’t air an image of Mohammed, the network was essentially saying: “We trust Christians not to go all crazy and stuff. Muslims, on the other hand …”

And how offensive is that?

Image Essays, Part 2: The Subconscious

Right from the moment I awoke this morning, there was something amiss. I should have been up at 6:30 a.m.; I ended up snoozing it until 7:15. And when I did get up, I commented to Mrs. Z. that I didn’t feel like I slept well.

But even as I said that, it didn’t ring true. I didn’t remember any extended periods of sleeplessness through the night. Worse still, my vague unsettledness had turned into a vague depression, for which I had even less justification.

Then, I had a flash of a dream I realized I had had just before waking. It’s a recurring nightmare in which my father, who passed away 12 years ago of a sudden heart attack, has not died, but instead lives on in a greatly weakened state with only a matter of time remaining before his death. And as an added bonus, my mom was in a similar condition in this particular dream.

A funny thing, the subconscious. As far as I am concerned, I have long since grieved for my father to the point of closure, and yet these dreams resurface. Do I still have subconscious issues concerning my father to accompany the quite conscious fears I have of seeing my mom grow old?
The most ironic thing is that this dream and the subsequent nervous introspection follow what I would consider four of the happier consecutive days I’ve had in a while. What to do when one’s mind’s eye develops a twitch?

Orbits: Part 1 of an Open-Ended Image Essay Series

I have a tendency to give people the benefit of the doubt -- perhaps to a fault. One example is my forgiving nature when it comes to friends who fall out of contact with me. My explanation for this is that people are like celestial bodies -- all with their own orbits. They rotate around the things that are most important in their lives, and it's not my place to judge the center of someone's universe.

Rather, I enjoy the time my oribt takes me into the paths of friends whom I don't see often. And I trust the fact that once our orbits have completed, we'll enjoy fellowship again.

True friends, on the other hand are gravitationally attracted to one another to the point where the orbits seem to coalesce. And those are special friends indeed.

(One editorial note: I apologize for my infrequency of posting, but health and other issues have kept me away. Hopefully this bit of metaphysical meat is enough for you to chew on for a while.)

Happy St. Patrick's Day

THE CELTS (Enya)

Video Code provided by VideoCodeZone.Com

In honor of the Emerald Isle, enjoy a little Enya. And thanks to CatPants for letting me know about VideoCodeZone.

We are supposed to make much revelry tonight and tomorrow, but Mrs. Z was feeling puny this morning, so we're not certain what the future holds. I've been informed I may need to take over as, in her words, "Party Master."

I'll brief you Monday.